Why Patience Can Be So Difficult On The Path To Success
The Deep Underlying Psychophysiological Factor That Gets In Our Way
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Why Patience Can Be So Difficult On The Path To Success
The Deep Underlying Psychophysiological Factor That Gets In Our Way
Not every day I have is like today.
Today, I am sitting at my Computer.
I Feel Competent.
I Feel like I "Finally" have at least a "Bit" of Grasp on Everything I'm working on.
I Feel like I Can Breathe.
I still have plenty of work to do, and many challenges ahead, do not get me wrong.
But today, things are Well.
There is a Path I can See Clearly.
I am Not At My Goals.
But I am Happy with Now.
I have this Deep Underlying Feeling of being Alright Having Patience to get to My Many Goals.
However, I have Not always been this way.
The Struggle With Patience
There are many Days where I Still Struggle with Patience.
I also work with Many Clients who Struggle with Patience.
We live in a World where we want Everything Now...
Actually, we want it "Yesterday", but we "Tolerate" getting it Now.
Yet, for all of our "Wanting" and "Desiring", we Still Struggle.
Patience is Not something that Seems to come Easily.
For many, it does Not feel Natural.
Patience can feel like Time is being Wasted and that there Must be Problems because we are Not Seeing "Results".
We See and Hear people talk about "Waiting" and "Patience" and "Seed and Harvest Times".
Yet, it All Feels Wrong.
Patience Feels Wrong.
I was thinking about this and the question crossed my mind...
Why Does Patience Feel So Wrong?
Why Do We, as a Society, Struggle with Patience?
The Wrong Answer
The First Answer that came to my mind is "Not" the Correct One.
I first thought that it was about Society.
We have Societal Expectations.
Marketers tell us Our Business should Grow Exponentially in our Sleep.
Pharmacists tell us Our Health should come back by Popping a Pill.
Leaders tell us Our Trust in them should Lead to Our Glory.
Yet, we Rarely See It Happen.
These Societal Expectations and Standards often are Untrue and we Feel like we are being Used and Abused.
In Many Ways, We are.
Tactics are being used by these Outside Forces that Directly Target Our Psychophysiology.
Pushing us in Unnatural Ways toward Their Goals.
Even at the Expense of Our Lives.
Literally.
Indeed, these are All Real Problems that Exist in the World, and play a Role in "Why" Patience is Such a Struggle for Us.
But these are Not the "True" Reason that Patience is Difficult.
So, what is it then?
What Underlies All of this?
Why Do We, As Humans, Struggle With Patience?
The True Reason We Struggle With Patience
It has Nothing to do with the Outside World Around Us.
It 100% Has To Do With Ourselves.
The Problem is that We Do Not Accept Who We Are Today and Where We Are Today.
It is that Simple.
Why Do We Struggle With Patience?
Because We Reject Ourselves Today.
We Look in the Mirror.
We Reject What We See.
We Put In Hard Efforts And Labor.
We Reject Our Work.
We Look At Our Health.
We Reject Our Progress.
At Every Step of the Way, We Reject Ourselves.
This makes Patience Extremely Difficult.
How can You Live With what You Reject?
We are Not Running "Toward" Some Goal.
We are Running "Away" from Who and What We Are Today.
We Lack Patience because We Run in Fear.
We Sprint, Believing Subconsciously That the Things we Run Toward will "Change" Our Perceptions of Ourselves.
But They Never Do.
The Consequences Of Running
In a Best Case Scenario, the things we Run Toward Elude Us.
Why is that the Best Case Scenario?
Because if you "Obtain" that which you Seek, without Accepting Yourself First, the Void is Never Filled.
You are Promised by One Thing or Another that this "Next" Thing will Fill You.
But It Does Not.
Which Only Increases the Void.
We Obtain that "Thing", but it Destroys Us because It Never Solves the Real Problem.
Accepting Ourselves.
Loving Ourselves.
This is Why Patience is So Difficult.
What We Seek And Need As Humans
Internally, We Seek Acceptance.
We "Need" Acceptance.
From others, sure.
But More Importantly, From Ourselves.
When We Do Not Accept Ourselves, we are Impatiently Trying to Find "Any" Way to Accept Ourselves.
But it is Usually Subconscious, while the Conscious is Focused on What is Outside of Ourselves.
The New Path Toward Unlimited Patience
But what Happens when we First Accept Ourselves...
Completely...
Utterly...
Fully...
Love Ourselves As We Are...
Including Our Flaws...
Including Our Failures...
Including Our Humanness?
When we Accept Ourselves Fully, we have All the Time in the World.
Patience is Simple, because We Have All We Need.
Will We Continue to Act towards Goals?
Yes.
As Humans, we have an Innate Desire to Express Ourselves through some form of Creation.
This is Why Flow States are known as "Autotelic", or We Seek Them as an End and for No Other Reason.
Flow States are "Where" We are Most Creative.
But to Reach those States, Frequently and Consistently, we must become Deeply Present to Now.
This is Impossible though when we are Sprinting Away from the Now.
The Glory of Our Potential Exists within Us Today.
We must Find that Potential, Grow that Potential, and Accept that we are Perfect as We Are Today.
Within that, is where we Find Unlimited Patience.
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Now I Know what you are probably Thinking…
How can I Do This?
Many people, myself included, have Struggled with Accepting Ourselves for Years and Decades.
Trust me.
I have been to the “Literal” Edge of Self-Hatred.
Face-to-Face with the Angel of Death in my Self-Hatred.
I only Know these Feelings Too Well.
But there “Is” Hope.
There “Are” Ways to Accept Ourselves.
Let’s Dive In…
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